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I was trolling around online and came across some nonsense Catholic booster site that contained this absolutely delicious quote:

“The Church’s teaching on masturbation is unrealistic.”

[M]any factors are involved when judging the degree of guilt of any individual who engages in a wrong action such as masturbation. Although masturbation is fundamentally sinful,

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So the Michelle Bachmann lustbuch has already been making the rounds — Jezebel, Wonkette, Balloon-Juice — but I couldn’t resist quoting the blurb on the e-book’s own cover graphic:

He touched the void inside her, pollinating her pink flower like a master bee.

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Ladies, if your favorite caucus can’t sustain a Boehner, Crave has a memory stick just for you.

HT The Times Suggests Putting This Flash Drive Up Your Hoohah by Hilary Moss.


This is really fucked up:

Louisiana, like most states, bars prostitution. But the state also has a 206-year-old law that carries special penalties for those charged with soliciting oral or anal sex — the so-called Crime Against Nature statute.

Those convicted under the C.A.N. law can be required to register as sex offenders.

Yesterday, the New York-based Center for Constitutional Rights filed suit in New Orleans, claiming the law unconstitutionally discriminates against gays and others who engage in the targeted acts. (Here’s a report on the suit from the New Orleans Times-Picayune and here’s a copy of the complaint.) […]

At a news conference in New Orleans, attorneys for the plaintiffs said the registration requirement erects “insurmountable barriers” to people who are trying to restart their lives, the Times-Picayune reports.

In New Orleans, according to the paper, nearly 40 percent of the people registered as sex offenders are on the registry because of a crime against nature conviction.

Louisiana is the only state where people convicted of selling their bodies can be required to register as a sex offender, the Times-Picayune reports, citing the lawsuit.


One question that I think often gets lost in the abortion debate is “What would happen if we criminalized all abortion?

Well, here’s a brief answer in the context of Africa:

Worldwide, there are 19 million unsafe abortions a year, and they kill 70,000 women (accounting for 13 percent of maternal deaths), mostly in poor countries like Tanzania where abortion is illegal, according to the World Health Organization. More than two million women a year suffer serious complications. According to Unicef, unsafe abortions cause 4 percent of deaths among pregnant women in Africa, 6 percent in Asia and 12 percent in Latin America and the Caribbean

The 120-bed hospital in Berega [Tanzania] depends on solar panels and a generator, which is run for only a few hours a day. Short on staff members, supplies and even water, the hospital puts a lot of its scarce resources into cleaning up after failed abortions…

On a Friday in January, 6 of 20 patients in the women’s ward were recovering from attempted abortions. One, a 25-year-old schoolteacher, lay in bed moaning and writhing. She had been treated at the hospital a week earlier for an incomplete abortion and now was back, bleeding and in severe pain. She was taken to the operating room once again and anesthetized, and Emmanuel Makanza, who had treated her the first time, discovered that he had failed to remove all the membranes formed during the pregnancy. Once again, he scraped the inside of her womb with a curet, a metal instrument. It was a vigorous, bloody procedure. This time, he said, it was complete…

Dr. Mdoe said he suspected that some of the other illegal abortionists were hospital workers with delusions of surgical skill.

“They just poke, poke, poke,” he said. “And then the woman has to come here.” Sometimes the doctors find fragments of sticks left inside the uterus, an invitation to sepsis…

“We as medical personnel think abortion should be legal so a qualified person can do it and you can have safe abortion.” There are no plans in Tanzania to change the law…

The steady stream of [botched illegal, amateur abortion] cases reflects widespread ignorance about contraception. Young people in the region do not seem to know much or care much about birth control or safe sex, Dr. Mdoe said…

In most countries the rates of abortion, whether legal or illegal — and abortion-related deaths — tend to decrease when the use of birth control increases. But only about a quarter of Tanzanians use contraception…

An assistant medical officer, Telesphory Kaneno, said: “Talking about sexuality and the sex organs is still a taboo in our community. For a woman, if it is known that she is taking contraceptives, there is a fear of being called promiscuous.”

In interviews, some young women from the area who had given birth as teenagers said they had not used birth control because they did not know about it or thought it was unsafe: they had heard that condoms were unsanitary and that birth control pills and other hormonal contraceptives could cause cancer.

Here are Tristero’s thoughts on the above article:

Access to a safe and legal abortion is a moral good. The decision to terminate a pregnancy should be an entirely private one, and the right to make such a difficult decision in private is also a moral good.

The cultural war in this country over the right to a safe and legal abortion is, as it has been for past forty years, not really a religious struggle. It is, as Denise Grady’s brave article demonstrates, really about guaranteeing healthcare for poor women. Those opposed to keeping abortion safe and legal – ie, those who seek to deny professional medical care to poor women – wrap their repressive agenda in the robes of priests in order to hide the moral idiocy of their position. They spew false sanctity in the service of extremism and bigotry.

We stand on the moral high ground in the abortion debate, not those who use terrorism – the murder of Dr. Tiller – as an excuse to deplore access to safe and legal abortion.


Wow. This has got to be the best Craigslist ad ever:

With those cold depressing days of winter behind us, if you can’t frolic through the wildflower fields of Southern California, then what better way welcome the warm weather than sprucing up your boring apartment with a little spring decorating.

Hurry now because this original Samantha H. coffee table won’t last long. What? You’ve never heard of the Samatha H. collection? Maybe that’s because you’ve never been to a brothel or visited enough public bathroom stalls where you surely would have seen her name etched on the wall. Samantha H. is my ex-girlfriend and two weeks ago I plowed her on top of this coffee table before she squeezed her fat ass back into her size 12 jeans and went out to the Pig’N Whistle and banged my best friend (who she’s now dating). Don’t let the glass top fool you. It’s 3/8″ thick, can take a pounding and cleans up fast (personally I suggest 409’s spermicidal-antibacterial all surface cleaner).

Update: It looks like the original Craigslist ad got flagged and is no longer up, but you’ve got the full text to read, in all its glory, above.

Edit: Changed the name in the above to only include a last initial.

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Funny how it turns out that the people who consume the most porn come from the most Christianist states in the Union:

Those states that do consume the most porn tend to be more conservative and religious than states with lower levels of consumption, the study finds.

“Some of the people who are most outraged turn out to be consumers of the very things they claimed to be outraged by,” Edelman says.