And my immediate thought was Louie Gohmert, then I second-guessed myself and said it was Steve Stockman. Shoulda trusted my instincts! Also acceptable guesses: Steve “Esteban” King, Michele Bachmann, Rand Paul. (2 comments)Lawmaker Says Woman Should Carry Brain Dead Fetus to Term
Today’s case of omgareyouseriouslyfuckingkiddingme-youridiculousmediaassholes:
A number of readers have raised questions [ed: FAINT!] about the president’s statement that he goes skeet shooting “all the time”… In these suspicious times, they would like to see some evidence. But the White House has been oddly silent about the matter.
OMG! Questions have been raised! The White House is being SILENT!! Bring this man some smelling salts!
For those of you who haven’t seen the Standard Media Playbook, here’s what happens with bullshit like this:
- WaPo asshole shoots a quick inquiry into the White House on the earth-shatteringly-important question of whether Obama is lying about his skeet shooting claims – in the face of exactly ZERO evidence to suggest that.
- White House aides receive WaPo asshole’s stupid fucking inquiry and then proceed to laugh and pass it around to friends and loved ones to spur similar bouts of hilarity.
- While said White House aides are languidly enjoying themselves, WaPo asshole rushes out an OMGZ ALARMS! “Fact Check” article, which makes dark and insidious insinuations about those mean White House aides who are TOTALLY IGNORING MY SERIOUS INQUIRY, GUYS! SERIOUSLY!
- WaPo asshole’s fact check article predictably (MOAR DELICIOUS LINKS PLEASE!) stirs up the Right Wing Outrage Machine to Level 10 (,000,000!!), and wingnuts breathlessly bemoan how President O’Stalin McHitler is like totally plotting secret FEMA death camps under the code name “America Skeet Shoot” because Jesus.
- White House aides check the intertrons at some point and see WaPo asshole’s stupid fucking fact check. They then send him an email with a photo showing Obama skeet shooting (which, presumably, WaPo asshole could have found himself by searching said intertrons) with a subject line reading “Are you serious? Suck on this.”
- WaPo asshole posts the photo as an “update” to an article that remains titled: “The White House’s curious silence about Obama’s claim of skeet shooting”. Thus, the whole stupid fucking exercise will be enshrined in the Articles of Impeachment that Eric Cantor is drawing up as the 438,311th count of High Treason.
No wonder so many people choose to completely ignore politics and the media bullshit surrounding it.
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Hors D’oeuvres
Saw this headline in the RSS reader, with no additional information:Sen. Saxby Chambliss (R-GA), makin’ with the insightful diagnosis of current events y’all, via TPM:“The President’s speech today will be viewed by terrorists as a victory,” said Chambliss, who recently golfed with the president, in a statement. > more ... (1 comments)
Sorry, folks, work has gotten crazy, and I realize I’ve been missing my (self-imposed) quota. But I’ll be back at you soon. Try to post something substantial tomorrow. (1 comments)Watching a Jerk Seize Main Chance
I so called this (pinkey swear) but I didn’t want to be the jerk who forecast somebody else f*ckin’ this particular chicken so soon:Oklahoma Republican Sen. Tom Coburn will seek to offset federal aid to victims of a massive tornado that blasted through Oklahoma City suburbs on Monday with cuts elsewhere in the budget.
> more ... (0 comments)Judge Posner for the Win: Drastic Action Necessary To Un-F*ck U.S. Patent Regime
Sometimes you really have to hand it to Judge Posner.The sheer number of patents in the U.S. is fueling frivolous litigation and drastic action is needed to make patents more difficult to obtain and easier to invalidate, U.S. Circuit Judge Richard Posner of the Seventh Circuit said Tuesday. > more ... (0 comments)
I continue to think that there’s no deeper scandal on Benghazi and that the IRS issue is not really something I’m inclined to worry about as it wasn’t national policy, the AP scandal is something that is very worrisome as it clearly was national policy and exposes one of the more disgraceful areas of the > more ... (1 comments)Rep. Michele Bachmann Threatens To Leave Minnesota Over Gay Marriage
So much awesome:Congresswoman Michele Bachmann threatened to leave Minnesota today if the state goes ahead with its plans to legalize gay marriage. In an interview with a local television station, the conservative firebrand said she believes God will destroy Minneapolis once the legislation is enacted, and wants to be far away when the reckoning happens. > more ... (4 comments)
Polled GOP Respondents Say Obama Hangnail Worse Than Holocaust
Announcement: Ignorant fucktards who think all this Benghazi bullshit is the worst thing to to happen since Jesus died are required to report to their local suicide booth immediately.… there’s no doubt about how mad Republicans are about Benghazi. 41% say they consider this to be the biggest political scandal in American history > more ... (2 comments)
Bioshock Infinite Causes Christian Gamer To Cry And Make Piddles
Some excitable christian fundamentalist nerd got all worked up into a lather because the game Bioshock Infinite required the main character to undergo a baptism.
“As baptism of the Holy spirit is at the center of Christianity – of which I am a devout believer – I am basically being forced to make a choice between committing extreme blasphemy by my actions > more ... (1 comments)
Just read this: This afternoon Senator Reid asked unanimous consent to go to conference on the concurrent resolution on the Budget. Senator Cruz was unavailable to be on the floor at this time to object. Out of respect for the long tradition of comity in the Senate, Senator Reid withdrew his request. Your eyes might drift to > more ... (1 comments)
As some of you have noticed, the site has been experiencing intermittent availability issues over the past many months. I’ve been working with our hosting company to try to find and fix the problem(s) – but they’ve proven themselves to be feckless, yet earnest. > more ... (0 comments)Why It's Important For Atheists To Stop Worrying About Religionists' Fee-Fees
Sean Carroll rightly calling on atheists to speak out and stop being polite about it:We have a responsibility to get the word out—to not be wishy-washy on the question of religion as a way of knowing, but to be clear and direct and loud about how reality really works. > more ... (1 comments)
We Paid For the Shadow Demon, We're Gonna Use the Shadow Demon
I realize that of all things featured in life’s rich tapestry this hardly rates a mention, but apparently another Dungeons and Dragons movie is making noise in the ‘Wood: The studio is actually quite far along in the development of the project, as it will use a script by Wrath Of The Titans and Red Riding > more ... (1 comments)The Loudly Ignorant Become Less So Once Shown They're Ignorant
I’m surprised that any of the fervently ignorant people surveyed in this study ever ended up moderating their positions. I wonder if the researchers included teabaggers in the sample population…
Four researchers at three different institutions joined forces to ask a simple question: why is it that people have such extreme positions on subjects that are rather complicated and nuanced? > more ... (0 comments)
I’m a sucker for arty books and paper inventions. (Not necessarily books about art, although those can be interesting too, if unaccountably heavy and given to making my floors creak.) The Museum of Lost Wonder, various items in the Wondermark Goodsery (no relation), the Edward Gorey Dracula Playset (of course), and pop-up books of > more ... (0 comments)Today's Trivia: Presidential IQs
Just found this Wikipedia list that has IQ scores for all U.S. Presidents (excluding Obama). The biggest surprise is how low Wilson comes considering his background and education, though it kinda makes sense considering how much stock he put in his own intellect, only to make the same mistakes again and again and never learn > more ... (1 comments)
THE GRAPEVINE
You know, I was just thinking yesterday that maybe the standard national news shows and press blah-blahs oughtta all have a 5 minute montage entitled “shit that’s too stupid to cover” that will allow them to air the nonsense various factions are gassing about while giving them cover to talk about things that are more important than, say, Kim Kardassian’s whatever. A small step away from confusing actual news with tabloid “shit we’re covering solely because somebody mentioned it”.
Now I’m-a go daydream about doing the backstroke in a pool filled with K-Pop stars because if I’m gonna be thinking about impossible nonsense, why not shoot for the moon, amirite?