One of the first things I thought when I saw that Vermont became the first state in the U.S. to legalize same-sex marriage by an act of the state legislature is that we are now in store for a no-holds-barred, end-of-the-4th-quarter, all-hands-on-deck wave of insane right-wing mass hysteria.

I was right:

In recent days, there has been no shortage of fear-mongering about same-sex marriage. Right-wing groups have said that marriage equality removes the “cornerstone of society” and may “destroy…democracy.”

Morality in Media President Bob Peters goes even further today, linking same-sex marriage to the recent tragic uptick in mass murders:

This secular value system is also reflected in the ’sexual revolution,’ which is the driving force behind the push for ‘gay marriage;’ and the Iowa Supreme Court decision is another indication that despite all the damage this revolution has caused to children, adults, family life and society (think abortion, divorce, pornography, rape, sexual abuse of children, sexually transmitted diseases, trafficking in women and children, unwed teen mothers and more), it continues to advance relentlessly.

It most certainly is not my intention to blame the epidemic of mass murders on the gay rights movement! It is my intention to point out that the success of the sexual revolution is inversely proportional to the decline in morality; and it is the decline of morality (and the faith that so often under girds it) that is the underlying cause of our modern day epidemic of mass murders.

Yep, because those damn Gays keep pushing for equality under the law, society keeps descending into ever-increasing states of apocalyptic madness and lawlessness.

It really is quite amazing how much power The Gays have to bring society to its knees.* We’ve now been found out as being responsible for a wave of mass murders. Jerry Falwell revealed that we were the ones behind 9/11. Most recently, Pat Robertson gave up our secret when he disclosed that The Gays (especially Ellen Degeneres) were responsible for bringing forth God’s Wrath upon News Orleans in the form of Hurricane Katrina.

Can one of my Gay comrades-in-arms out there with a background in science please do some tests and distill out the omnipotent essence that resides within us that allows us to perform such tremendous feats?

I’d really like to use it to, say, learn a dozen languages, win the lottery and convert Colin Farrell to our side of the fence. We can’t waste such unbridled power on silly things like mass murders, terrorist attacks and annoying wind storms. Poppa needs a new pair of Prada sneakers!

At least I don’t feel as circumspect as I did the other day about writing my article entitled The Chilling Rise of Right-Wing Hate in America. After all, if The Gays have a heavy hand in sparking the mass murders currently sweeping our country, then at least it’s also quite likely that Michelle Malkin and Glenn Beck are behind it too!

* – So sue me, the pun was intended.

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  1. Gherald L says:

    It really is quite amazing how much power The Gays have to bring society to its knees. […] Can one of my Gay comrades-in-arms out there with a background in science please do some tests and distill out the omnipotent essence that resides within us that allows us to perform such tremendous feats?

    "The importance of portraying 2 percent of the population as far more powerful than the 98 percent and the need to keep that 2 percent from destroying civilization -- and allegedly making Christianity illegal -- has some interesting historical forebears."Andrew Sullivan

  2. Friar_Zero says:

    I love how the author says " It most certainly is not my intention to blame the epidemic of mass murders on the gay rights movement " and then does just that.

    • Gherald L says:

      Hmm, no. The article doesn't blame mass murders on the gay rights movement, it merely claims both phenomena have a common cause. (the decline of morality)

      • Metavirus says:

        a fair point but it's ultimately two routes to the same goal, i.e., "linking" the gays to apocalyptic craziness. and besides, if gays didn't cause all this mayhem, would we someday be able to distill my +5 Elixir of Omnipotent Gayness? ;-)

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